Tag: online dating
10 rules of online dating
1. MODESTY IS NOT SEXY
A lot of people start their profile with something like: “I’m not good at this sort of thing” or “I’m probably not everyone’s type” . You’re not doing yourself any favours by writing like this. Don’t put yourself down as you’ll sound unattrative, needy and insecure.
2. … AND SO IS SHOWING OFF
Being confident is sexy BUT arrogance is an absolute TURN-OFF. There is a very fine line. “I can cook a great spaghetti bolognese and I’ll always try to make you giggle” is good, but “I make loads of money at my high-flying job and people always as how can I be single” is really not.
3. “I LIKE GOING OUT WITH FRIENDS AND LISTENING TO MUSIC…”
Your profile needs to be eye-catching. Not the obvious, usual same ‘ol same ‘ol. There is no point telling people you like sunsets, sex and music. Everyone does! Be original and specific about the things you like. Say which music you like or what your fav position is. Specific details doesn’t just make you sound interesting – it also gives potential dates something to write to you about and talk about.
4. DON’T OFFLOAD YOUR BAGGAGE
Most people will have a history of exes, hang-ups and bad relationships/experiences. There is no point unloading them all on to your potential new lover. Everyone has a past, but they don’t need to hear about it. Keep it zipped until you know each other better.
7. DON’T PUBLISH A SHOPPING LIST
Some people like to say what they are looking for. For example, I’m looking for someone with green eyes, long hair, between 5’10” and 6′ and with a French accent etc. This is very off-putting and narrows your potential matches.
8. NO PHOTO? NO CHANCE!
Don’t even think about posting a dating advert without a photo. A profile with no photo shows that you are potentially ugly and you don’t want to risk posting your photo. Posting something is better than nothing.
9. ONLY ONE PHOTO?
People always will want to see more than one photo because one pic is not a reliable example of what you look like. Try and upload at least two or three photos.
9. NO PHOTOSHOPPING
A photoshopped photo that makes you look better than you really are will back-fire big time. When you eventually arrange a date with someone, if you look different to your photo will make you look like a serial killer at worst, or just a liar at best.
10. YOU MAY NOT GET MANY MESSAGES
This is a cruel fact of life that you may not get as many messages/emails as you would like. Especially for guys. There is typically more male profiles than female photos on any dating website so there will be a lot of competition if you’re a guy. But don’t get disappointed. It my just take you a little longer to find your perfect match so don’t give up!
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How To Create Online Attraction
Online dating is sometimes more difficult than it looks. Use these simple techniques to create attraction and have online dating success!
Have you ever seen an ugly guy or a big, fat guy with a gorgeous woman? First reaction: He’s got money; that’s why she’s with him. But, there’s always an occasion where a woman is with the guy because she feels that attraction. The next question is: How does a guy create attraction? There are many different ways. You can use humor, you can tease her, be a challenge she can’t resist, take control and act as the leader, be charming and conﬁdent—there are so many different things.
Get a list of pick up lines right now and you’ll see some that are so re-hashed that you KNOW girls have heard them all before. But you know what? Some guys still make these lines work for them. In fact, some guys can simply say “hello” and they get the women’s attention. It’s not what you say, but how you say it.
Conﬁdence shows in the way you walk, the tone of voice you use and taking control of the situation. In other words, instead of letting her decide where you’re going to go, take control and you make the plans.
Another concept is humor. Women love funny men. Be funny, make jokes. When I’m with a girl, I always like to people watch. Women love doing this and you can always people watch and make funny comments about what other people are wearing, how they’re walking or their voices and stuff like that, just between you two.
Remember to keep it light, so that she knows you’re kidding. And most important of all, don’t get all piqued when she turns the tables on you and puts you at the receiving end of a joke. The best part of being funny is you draw out the funny side of the girl. When you’re laughing together, acting silly and exchanging pokes, you can bet she can feel the connection (and the attraction for you).
One thing about a guy that will make a woman turn her head regardless of how he looks is his personality. And “personality” has something to do with the way you set yourself apart from other men. When women ﬁnd a man who has a great personality, they usually say he’s down-to-earth and easy to talk to. What does these mean?
Being down-to-earth simply means you’re not walking on eggshells around her, you’re not making her feel awkward by being awkward, and you’re not making it seem like you’re desperate to have her to like you back. At the same time, your whole demeanor will tell her that even if you are in like with her, you won’t put up with BS. If she’s acting in a way that does not seem right to you, make it clear that you’re walking out (with a smile and a wave, of course).
This kind of attitude drives girls nuts with attraction. A part of their brain panics at the thought of losing an awesome guy to another girl who’s less bitchy, more affectionate and more attentive towards him.
Be A Challenge
Another thing to avoid is kissing her ass. I hate to say it, but women throw out tests. You’ve got to have conﬁdence and bust on them. That’s the perfect time to tease a woman. If a woman says, “Do these pants make my ass look big,” I might turn around and look and say, “Wow, really big. Whoa,” and smile because she knows you’re not being serious.
On the Internet, I might throw out something like, “Listen, I understand you’re not really attractive, guys can’t stand looking at you, they’re completely repulsed by looking at you, you’re not intelligent and you can’t carry on a conversation, so why are you on the Internet?” I’ll say it in a bit of a humorous way. It’s great because they know that I’m teasing them and I’m not kissing their ass. I’m not going to ask them all the time, “Are you okay? What do you need? Do you need anything?” No, I’m the guy. I’m the prize. She’s hanging around me. I don’t have to bend over backwards for her.
If the girl has a lot of spunk in her (and you can bet the prettiest ones out there have a lot of this), you’re almost guaranteed that she will take the bait.You’re someone she sees as a challenge, and in her head she secretly thinks it’s cute that you’re provoking her by teasing her.
Being Attractive Is Not All That When It Comes To Online Dating
Let’s face it, in online dating, being attractive is cheap. Why? Because you have a photo and a bunch of text describing yourself on your profile, and people judge you based on that. Or rather, they form an impression inside their head based on what they see. Now, we all know that you’re not going to put up a photo that doesn’t look good, right? Exactly.
The thing is, no matter how closely you resemble your photo, you will still look slightly different ofﬂine. She will either notice this or she will ignore it completely. It’s easy to ﬁgure out why women would love to go out with you regardless if you’ve gained weight since you took your bio photo or how much thinner your hair is.
On the other hand, if she sees you as a wimp, a bootlicker, a bore and a guy who’s always trying to impress her, you’d have wasted all the cash you spent on your skin (and hair) because she won’t be able to look past your bad personality or your desperation to really appreciate your looks.
For guys, we’re a little bit different. We’re more visual. They asked guys the same question and they guys all answered a body part, whether it’s breasts, legs,butt… So you see, women don’t place as high a value on looks as you might think they do, so if you’re not great looking, don’t worry.
They want somebody who’s funny, who’s a little bit cocky, who’s charming, who’s conﬁdent, who has a sense of humor, who’s a little bit of a challenge and who can put them in their place if needed. That’s the kind of stuff that women want.